Poetry Collection Sneak Peek #2

Hello all.

It's me again.

Sorry.

It's been a long time.

I've been incredibly busy the past few weeks, between prepping for the poetry collection's release, starting a little side business, and, most of all, working two jobs, I have had hardly any time to post anything on Discharge of a Rotting Mind. But, one of my jobs fired me because I had a second job and I have a bit of free time. So, I'm here now and with the poetry collection coming tomorrow or Thursday, I thought it would be a good idea to share another poem from that collection with you guys.

Nothing Makes Sense Anymore

The dawn’s arrived

Yet there is no light.

I hold my breath, waiting to die

Yet I just sleep

And when I awake

No one’s there to answer me.

I'll come around soon,

I think.

Colors fade to black,

Spilling out over the lines

That I’m suppose to fill in;

Lost and washed away.

I have two legs

But I have nothing to stand on.

My dreams are made of painted walls

Melting and mixing and turning black.

I'm watching

The world growing around me,

Yet I can't even sprout a leaf.

Maybe the dirt’s pulling me back down.

Outsides becoming insides,

Right becoming left.

Nothing makes sense anymore.

-2017-

That's all, guys.

I'm gonna leave you with one question and forgive me if it's a little cryptic.

Do you know maggots are used to treat wounded horses?

Stay rotten, everybody.

Frustrations and Other Thoughts

Hello all.

Me again.

I find myself complaining a lot lately, more commonly about the lack of time and the fact that there are only so many hours in the day. For instance, today is my day off and I have to get some writing done, clean my apartment, go to the bank, and record a video, all before my wife comes home (family always comes before work and we haven't spent much time together lately). So, I think today's blog post is going to have to be a brief one, on the count of having so much to do.

But, before we get into the post, Born Again is still free on Kindle until tomorrow night! So hurry up and get it downloaded before it goes back up to its full price! https://www.amazon.com/Born-Again-Kyle-Atwood-ebook/dp/B0719RNDMX/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1521484301&sr=8-2&keywords=kyle+atwood

Anyway, on with the rest of the post.

I already mentioned that time and I have not been getting along lately. It just seems that whenever I think I have time to catch up, I have to do something, whether it be going to work or going to the doctors or whatever have you, and that's fine, that's just how life is. What is not fine, is the fact that it still bothers me, despite me saying, "that's just how life is" and it sucks. Often times, while I'm at work, I'll keep repeating to myself that, "I'd rather be writing" and that is very true. The funny thing is, though, is that when I finally sit down to write, I get a great big case of writer's block and I end up sitting there for hours writing no more than a hundred or so words. That's life though.

My next frustration is marketing (it's only the eightieth time I've complained about it). Ironically enough, I've sold more books for Born Again last week when it was full priced, than I have when it has been free. I don't know what I'm doing wrong, but I wish the problem could be highlighted in blood red for me.

Frustration numero tres: I just feel like, the moment I start getting excited about something, be that YouTube or the articles I have been writing lately, I get no results from the work I put into them. Like, I don't want to record a video today because I know it will get no views and I'll probably even lose a subscriber, if I haven't already (and a subscriber for a channel with only twenty-four of them is like losing a thousand subscribers over night, it's bothersome). My articles generated more readers when I was writing them every couple of months, now I'm writing them every week or so, dedicate three days to writing each one and I wind up getting no more than ten views, I just feel wronged somehow. I'm insecure and all, boohoo, pity me and buy a book, eh? Just kidding, but I am insecure.

Frustration 4: I really want to own my domain name of my website and update it immensely, but I don't have enough money to do so. Day job doesn't pay me enough and I'm not generating nearly enough income from my books to afford that.

However, despite everything else moving like a slug, my blog has been generating more readers and that is FREAKING AWESOME! I went from having one or two people reading my posts, to ten, twenty, or thirty reading them and it makes me VERY HAPPY! Thank you guys.

Another fantastic side note is that my Twitter account has BLOWN up in the past month, surpassing my Facebook follower count (214 people) by hitting 220 followers, granted, about ten of them are probably lusty sex bots, but until they are banned from Twitter, I'M COUNTIN' 'EM!

You know, despite my frustrations, I'm actually rather happy. Don't know if I'm exactly optimistic about the future of my work, but at this exact moment, I feel excited for what I will be releasing starting with my poetry collection being released in a little under a month from now.

Anyway, be sure to download Born Again . It's free. What have you got to lose? Plus, it'll make me feel all warm and toasty inside.

Check out my latest article at:
https://hubpages.com/entertainment/The-Golden-Age-of-Slasher-Films

So, that's all for today's post, guys, I've gotta get started on cleaning (my apartment is a complete disaster and no that is not an over exaggeration, it is complete fact).

Stay rotten, everybody.

The Brook Horse Sneak Peek

Healing

They lay me down

In a field of daisies

And ask me to sleep.

They open my chest,

They pull out my heart,

My stomach, lungs, kidneys, and more

And hang them on a wire

To heal in the sun,

But the crows have come

And are eating away.

-2018-

Yes, The Brook Horse is indeed a poetry collection.

In the past, I have talked about writing poetry again and again. It is, after all, how I
started my journey.

There will be poems ranging from the year 2012, to current day.

The collection will range from free verse narratives to more traditional, emotion driven
poems.

Not only will this collection be another release, but also a look back at the evolution of
myself as a writer.

A Bit More Backstory

From the years 2010-2013 I wanted to be a musician. My passion started out driven by hard rock/metal groups such as Staind, Nine Inch Nails, Linkin Park, Metallica, Alice Cooper, etc. I eventually calmed down and became heavily inspired by Johnny Cash, Iron and Wine, and numerous other indie/acoustic groups. So you'll see a few of those songs that I have written strictly from the later years, in this collection as well. Ironically enough, the self-titled poem The Brook Horse, that will be in this collection, started out as a song that I tried to write two years ago (it turned into a poem, of course).

Anyway, anyone who has known me personally for the past six years knows that I was extremely passionate about my music. Well, I wasn't anymore. I had way too many major disappointments and music became a punishment to myself, wasting time on building so many things only to break them down moments later. Music also ruined many relationships for me and even began to twist my mind, a narcissistic twisting motion that inflated my ego and kept me from pursuing my future. As I said, music became a punishment.

That's when I wrote my first poem and then another, and another, then... many... MANY poems later, I wrote my first short story, then another, and then I wrote my first book, Never Forgive Me, Never Forget Me.

Don't get me wrong, I still absolutely love music it is one of my most favorite forms of art, but as a musician, I was just in a bad place.

The First Poem I Wrote

The first poem I ever wrote has been lost to time, unfortunately, but the earliest poem I do still have was not at all a full length poem. It was a tanka and, for those of you who don't know, a tanka is an ancient Japanese style of poetry that consists of five lines in a syllable pattern of 5-7-5-7-7. It is basically a longer version of a haiku (three lines in 5-7-5). This is still my favorite form of poetry, I have a thing with short and sweet and both tanka and haiku provide me with such a thing and I always feel extremely relieved and satisfied when finishing one of these poems. In fact, you'll see quite a bit of those in The Brook Horse. Anyway, I'm feeling gracious today and I'll give you guys another sneak peek at one of the tankas that will be in the collection. Again, this is the oldest poem I have written that I have managed to keep for six years.

This Curse

This anathema,

Pertinacious to ruin

The vestige of me.

I am not venerable,

I am obstreperous here.

-2012-

I'll admit, while I was writing this, I had this study packet for a Nathaniel Hawthorne book we were reading called The House of the Seven Gables and, as per usual with books from the 1800's, there was some words that sounded pretty but I had no idea what they meant. So I wanted to make a poem with the old way of speaking, I was blending antique English language with ancient Japanese style in hopes of making the poem sound more profound. It worked and it sparked my first dozen fans and I figured, "Hey, I'm pretty good at this and it made me feel good! I should start doing this more!".

Another confession, I had forgotten what most of these words meant and I had to Google them again to make sure this poem made enough sense, to not only publish, but also share on my blog.

Another quick note: I just love how the physical appearance of the poem presents itself when finished. Dumb, fun fact.

My Goal for the Collection

My goal is to have over 140 poems inside of this collection, some new and freshly written, others from the vault known as my memory box (and believe me, I have written more than 200 poems in my life, just never published them). Hell, as I write this blog post I'm even considering changing the name of the collection, but as of right now, I think The Brook Horse is a very fitting name, and that will become apparent as we grow closer to its release, and crystal clear when it is released. I'm also using this release as a way to, basically, re-brand and experiment with other mediums to pair alongside the release, more towards my YouTube channel.

As a bonus, I'll share one of my songs I wrote in 2010 (no it is not going into the collection, it's horrible).

Sadness the Addiction

Sadness is a sick addiction 

and loneliness is the needle 

I choose to stick into my veins.

Yeah,

Fill me up

Off we go

Time to die

Never was so bold.

Sadness the addiction

A dumbass little bitch

Sadness the addiction

I hope it'll make me rich.

Collapse my veins,

Collapse my heart,

And collapse my life.

Yeah,

Fill me up

Off we go

Time to die

Never was so bold

Sadness the addiction

A dumbass little bitch

Sadness the addiction

I hope it'll make me rich.

Conclusion

So I hope you guys enjoyed the poems and be on the lookout for more news regarding The Brook Horse. I am aiming to release the collection in two months, but that is not set in stone. AT THE VERY LATEST it will be four months from now. More on that later.

So, take care guys, and, as always, stay rotten, everybody.